I had the wonderful opportunity to go through the Provo temple yesterday to receive my very own endowments. It was something that I pondered and prayed about for months. I finally felt like it was the right thing to do.
When people would find out that I was going through the temple, they would first ask, “Are you going on a mission?” Then, I would shake my head no, and they would ask, “Are you getting married?” I say no once again. Finally, they ask how old I am, and when I tell them that I am 19 years old, their eyes tend to get real big, and they get a puzzled look. Then, I finish the conversation by telling that I felt like it was time, so I am going. It really surprised people.
People tend to wonder why I am going through the temple, and at first, I didn’t really know how to respond. I couldn’t quite formulate into words why I wanted to go through, but ultimately, I figured it out.
A few months ago, one of my best friends got engaged, and I got to go with her family to the Relief Society Broadcast. Her fiance was leaving for the summer to go sell, and he wouldn’t get back until right before their wedding. The discussion of her going through the temple came up ad when she would do it. She wanted to wait for her fiance to get back, but her family pushed her to go through as soon as she could for a couple of reasons. First, for her to become comfortable with the endowment sessions before she got married so that it didn’t all come at once. Second, she was taking out her endowments for her, not for her fiance. They wanted it to be a special experience for her that wasn’t brushed to the side because her wedding was the main focus. I didn’t ever add to that conversation, but I did sit and listen very intently to both sides.
I actually continued to think about it for a few days. I didn’t think I could go through the temple, though, so it was more of thinking about what I will do when it comes time for me to go through the temple, whether it was for a wedding or for a mission. I even attended a temple prep class at Institute, and once again, the thought came back into my mind, and my desire to go through the temple only grew.
That is when I made my decision. I wanted to go through. I felt ready. I was going through for me. I wasn’t going through for a mission. I wasn’t going through for a wedding. I wasn’t going through for my future husband or family. Don’t get me wrong, it was definitely something that would benefit my family very much, but I was doing it for me.
After pondering it and praying about it, it felt like the right step to take in my life. I decided to talk to my bishop about it. We talked for a little while about it, and he told me that he felt as though I was mature enough that it was the right time for me. If it was something that I truly desired, I could do it.
He also said that one of the biggest struggles of those going through the temple is definitely the modesty. However, I have been raised to dress as if I were wearing garments already. That way, when the day came for me to wear garments, I wouldn’t need to get a new wardrobe. That, accompanied with my firm knowledge of who I am and ability to stand up for what is right, no matter what, was my ticket to receive my endowments.
My bishop handed me the Temple Prep book, told me to read it and come back next Sunday to talk about it. I did just that. The Spirit only confirmed that it was the right decision for me. We set up that actual interview and decided on the date to go through the temple. My entire family would be in town because we were heading on our family trip the following day.
I also chose the Provo temple because it has been in that temple this past year that I have grown the most spiritually, as well as had many questions answered, fears calmed, and comfort given. It has been such a blessing in my life. There was no hesitation when deciding which temple to go through. It was definitely the Provo temple.
The search for my temple dress started. I wanted something that no one else would have. I also wanted something beautiful because it was going to be that actual dress that I was going to be married in eventually. I searched and searched and searched. I tried all the dresses in Provo and Orem on, and still nothing. Then, I found it. It was perfect. I ordered it, and we crossed our fingers that it would get here in time. Thankfully, it came just in time. It was exactly what I wanted.
My interview with a counselor in the stake presidency for my recommend was one of the most spiritual experiences. The first thing he said to me was, “When is your wedding date?” I laughed and once again, went through the series of questions. But, it was different with him. I had never met this man, but I felt as though I had known him my entire life, and by looking at me, he knew everything about me, too. I don’t think I will ever be able to share what was said or the emotions felt, except with my eternal companion. I wrote everything down so that I would not forget, but I will say that it was definitely more confirmation that it was the right thing for me and it was full of lots of tears. Happy tears.
Then, last week, I was preparing my lesson for relief society when I came across this talk. Literally, it was exactly what I needed to hear and definitely worth the listen.
Yesterday was my big day. I got to go through! All week I was stressing out because I moved out on Friday, in yesterday, went through the temple, and had to be repacked for our family trip that started today. There was so much to do and so little time. But, it was awesome.
I ended up going through the same time as another girl who was getting her endowments for the same reason. It was by no accident, either. Her name is Marissa, and we kinda looked alike! Isn’t that crazy?
Anyways, it was so awesome. I am beyond grateful that I made the decision to receive my endowments. I am grateful for the covenants I made, and I promise to keep them forever. I cannot wait to go back to the temple to continue learning and becoming more like Him.
I cannot being to express how gratifying it is to have worked my entire life for this and finally obtained it. It has been nothing but easy to live the commandments, but it definitely is worth it. The road doesn’t end here, though. I will continue to choose what is right.
This gospel is true, and I love it so incredibly much.